Thursday, January 9, 2014
It reminds me of the time I went to visit an elderly relative in an old folks home. There was this guy who I was told suffered from dementia who the first time I met him walked up and sprayed in the face with a cold water misting bottle, the kind used for tending houseplants. When I asked him what in the hell he was doing he simply replied, "My job. I work for the Misting Peoples Bureau." And, then I swore he winked and pranced of singing to himself some offbeat ditty.
When I complained to one of the attendants, I was told that he was harmless enough and was here because he was a nuts. My gut told me the old geezer was a scammer and must've had no family to take care of him so he was living off the state's nickel, much like being in the pen but with lesser restrictions and better food.
I made a note to myself to watch the old guy and when he headed for the can I was going to follow him planning on pissing on his leg while he was filling up his water bottle. When he asks what in the hell I'm doing I'm gonna tell him that I work for the Humane Society and was sent to test out a theory on how well old dementia patients like him would respond to elderly dogs treating them like trees or fireplugs.